Wednesday 29 December 2010

Perfection

What is perfection?


I typed the word 'perfect' into an online dictionary, and there were so many definitions for that one simple word, but does anybody really know what it is? Does the state of perfection even exist?


Below is a list of the first 10 definitions according to this website:
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/Perfect )


1.
conforming absolutely to the description or definition of an ideal type: a perfect sphere; a perfect gentleman.
2.
excellent or complete beyond practical or theoretical improvement: There is no perfect legal code. The proportionsof this temple are almost perfect.
3.
exactly fitting the need in a certain situation or for a certainpurpose: a perfect actor to play Mr. Micawber; a perfectsaw for cutting out keyholes.
4.
entirely without any flaws, defects, or shortcomings: perfect apple; the perfect crime.
5.
accurate, exact, or correct in every detail: a perfect copy.
6.
thorough; complete; utter: perfect strangers.
7.
pure or unmixed: perfect yellow.
8.
unqualified; absolute: He has perfect control over his followers.
9.
expert; accomplished; proficient.
10.
unmitigated; out-and-out; of an extreme degree: He made aperfect fool of himself.

Now I relate my subject to reality. To people. In films, romantic ones - the protagonists always find their 'perfect' match ... but is there such a thing? 

I know and believe two people can be right for each other, can be a good match, and can be happy, but perfection? Every couple argues right? Which is good as it ventilates emotions rather than holding them in, and yes they can overcome the issues being argued about... But in the Disney romances where Cinderella meets Prince Charming - He is perfection, but if you brought that to reality he would surely have some flaws, even if they were minor ones like leaving the toilet seat up. There is always bound to be something that people in relationships don't like about the other, an annoying trait or habit, something. But it's accepting that trait that makes them work, accepting that trait, that is love. 

I don't believe in 'perfect' relationships and I certainly don't believe in 'perfect' human beings. Everyone has a defect, no matter how small. That is what I believe. 

When my boyfriend turns to me, smiles and says "You're perfect" it makes me happy, but I don't believe it. I then tell him the same despite how I don't believe any one person can be perfection. That is because I love him, and when you love someone you don't notice their defects often you even grow to love them. I however notice my own. Everyone surely must have their 'off' days. The days where you look into the mirror and wonder what your boyfriend sees in you, the mornings you wake up and just want to fall right back to sleep again, the times you try so hard to get your hair to look just right, but it wont go how you want it. Everyone has those days. Often it is my boyfriend who brings me out of them, with his compliments and loving eyes. It's the days I don't see him that are the worst. 

As the saying goes "An artists biggest critic is himself" ... Well a persons biggest critic is themselves. I bet I could find a million more flaws in myself than you could, and I bet you could do the same with yourself. But it's not all about aesthetics, sure Prince Charming is only seen dating a Beautiful Princess is those fantasies, but how charming is he is he can't see past simple aesthetics? 

I once watched an interview with Taylor Swift on some TV programme and she was asked if she ever has those 'off' days and what she said stuck in my mind ... She compared our looks to getting new clothes, she said "When you buy a new outfit it suddenly becomes your favourite outfit and you want to wear it all the time, until you buy the next new thing and that becomes your favourite. Well with your looks you can't just change your face or physical appearance like you can your clothes. Your face is the thing you have owned the longest so it's no surprise it's the thing we like the least." ..Well it went something like that anyway. I think it is a very relate-able statement. But if everyone went around changing their faces every time they got bored of it then we would not be able to recognise who you were. Changing your face would be like changing your personality, who you are. It is who you are, the person underneath as well as the exterior which defines beauty. 

...Coming back to the main definition of 'perfect' ... in the first definition it says: "conforming absolutely to the description or definition of an ideal type" ... well who defines what is perfect in the first place? If it was not for their 'definition' we would not have people all over the world upset because the don't look as skinny as the models in Vogue for example. Who defines perfection? I say each to their own. Everyone has their own 'type' the kind of person they look for when dating, so everyone has their own definition of what perfection is because everyone defines it differently when looking for their 'perfect match'. As my step dad has always said to me, "for every hundred men who like skinny women, there are a hundred who like larger women, for every one hundred men who like blondes, there are a hundred who like brunettes, etc." 

If my boyfriend calls me perfect than that is because to him, I am beautiful, I am his 'type' and I am what he has been looking for. If I disagree and say that I am not perfect, then I am too busy comparing myself to other people. Comparing ones self to another is never a successful route to take. We need to learn to accept ourselves for who we are. 

Something I am going to learn to do is to look into the mirror and say "I am beautiful" and I want you all to do it too. No-ones opinion of you matters except your own. So what I have a birthmark on my eye, it makes me unique, so what you may not think I'm pretty, your opinion does not matter. 

Perfection is something you will believe in when you are in love, or when you have children. Only the people you love are perfection and that is that truth. When you love someone - in your eyes they are perfect. When you have a child, that child will be perfect. That is perfection, perfection is love. 

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